Thursday, April 5, 2007

Parks and LSD

Now people, do not blame me for using footage yet again. This one, I had to use. You'll know why.

One of the tests of endurance that unfortunate medical students (the implication here being that ALL medical students are unfortunate; and not a mere percentage of the medical students being unfortunate) have to undergo is a subject called,

*eggs, the rotten kind, tomatoes, the mold infested kind, farts, the post-Sankranti scybalous kind, bottled scent, the Vrishabhaavati canal kind and curses, ranging in variety from the incestuous to the paraphiliac to the kind favored by irate truckdrivers*

PREVENTIVE AND SOCIAL MEDICINE.

This festering piece of godawful nonsense, also called Community Medicine, comes in an unattractive, garish-blue, unimaginably boring tome-that-leads-to-your-tomb called,

*(all those said above) and a deep, well gathered kwak-thoo*

PARK'S TEXTBOOK OF P.S.M a.k.a. THE HOLY (whatever book suits your religious inclination) OF COMM. MED.

Now this book is no walk in the, er, Park. It is studded, you know, like studddedd with lines that can make the hair at the back of your neck spring up in gravity-defying trich-s and get your ribs all worked up.
But, those are for another post. If at all.

For now, let us concentrate on how Park and Park, in a fit of affection towards the much harassed med studs (oooh, coolness) decided to pass on some nefarious information.

On LSD -
"LSD, Lysergic Acid Diethylamide, was synthesised in 1938 by Hoffmann in the Sandoz Labs in Switzerland. Its psychic properties were noticed much later in 1943, when he accidentally sniffed a few micrograms of it(poor thing, thought it was whitener perhaps).

* LSD is a potent psychotogenic agent.
* LSD alters the normal structuring of perception. The individual perceives the world in a different manner.
* There is intensification of colour perception and auditory acuity; body image distortions, visual illusions, fantasies, pseudohallucinations are common.
* Colours are heard and music becomes palpable.
* Subjective time is deranged so that seconds seem to be minutes and minutes pass as slowly as hours.
* Physical dependence does not develop with LSD; hence there is no addiction liability.
* No characteristic abstinence syndrome is manifest upon abrupt discontinuation of chronic use of the drug."

So.
Go ahead; tell me you are not tempted.

All this in a textbook. Seems nothing short of an advertisement brochure. These Park guys lived in Jabalpur. Something tells me, students there have more fun than we do here.

13 comments:

Malaveeka said...

You medikal istudent?

Aw. Poor you.

I almost became that once.

Long ago.

*shudders*

The Darkling Thrush said...

*snort*

heh. pun and all.

Spunky Monkey said...

@Malaveeka: Hess, i yum medikal shtoodent.
Its not that bad, actually. Will try and write about the varry mech funns we have during case presentations and the OPD.
Not as dreary as *medicine* sounds.

@Thrush: Hmm.

The Darkling Thrush said...

ok.
nice post.

happy?

Malaveeka said...

My parents are doctors.

So I know some.

I'm very fascinated by the human body.

i'm assuming you're doing human medicine?

Spunky Monkey said...

Pardon my being all cocky about this. But,
people who study tooth medicine should be called Dentists and not doctors.
people who study animal medicine should be called Veterinarians and not doctors.
people who get their Ph.D's must be called Ph.D's and not doctors.

No, this is not for snob value.
Just the practicality of it.

So yes, i do human medicine.

Quietly Amused said...

take it from someone who's been there, park isn't so bad if you aren't writing an exam based on it. and malveeka, i'll have to agree with the monkey about the fact that practitioners of dental and animal medicine are best referred to as dentists and vets. and spunky where you be doing your medicine?

Quietly Amused said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Spunky Monkey said...

Spunky be anonymous.
But he can say he be doing medicine in of them medical colleges in Bangalore.
And having fun.
And playing word games.
And all that.

and a pissy cow said...

anonymous anthe.
maka nODko.

i told you. you just give hand it on a silver platter.

Spunky Monkey said...

Who is this pissy cow?
Who said i was anonymous?
I am Spunky Monkey.

Adorable Pancreas said...

I do know what you mean. Unfortunately.

Kyria said...

People should read this.